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The Hikikomori Idol's Secret Little Haven

from Oizys is Birthing Herself by Isabella James

/

lyrics

I was young when I realised the terror of my body,
I am old now and there's nothing I've done about it,
I am an antediluvian casket of my own poison,
Growing into masculine husks.

I was old when I realised this was trauma,
When I realised the things I felt and heard weren't real (or at least you say they aren't),
I am a penumbra puppeteer of a horror show,
I want to kill myself.

One thing I do know. I was blind but now I see,
So rip my eyes from their sockets I don't want to,
Witness myself ripping my legs ripping my arms,
Destroying my body destroying my self.

It doesn't make a difference,
We're going to hell,
It terrifies me,
I am forsaken both ways.

I was young when I realised the terror of existence,
I am old now and I know that this too solid flesh,
Could melt and thaw itself into a dew,
Mine eyes are made the fools.

I was young when you culled me,
You didn't kill me,
But you left me dead,
I will hit the ground.

I don't drink,
I don't smoke,
I don't breathe,
I don't think.

One thing I do know. I was blind but now I see,
So rip my eyes from their sockets I don't want to,
Witness myself ripping my legs ripping my arms,
Destroying my body destroying my self.

It doesn't make a difference,
We're going to hell,
It terrifies me,
I am forsaken both ways.

We're already in hell,
We're already in hell,
We're already in hell,
We're already in hell,
We're already in hell,
We're already in hell,
We're already in hell,
We're already in hell,
We're already in hell,
We're already in hell,
We're already in hell,
We're already in hell,
We're already in hell,
We're already in hell,
We're already in hell,
We're already in hell.

credits

from Oizys is Birthing Herself, released April 1, 2022

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Isabella James Leeds, UK

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